Patty - MY OPINION ONLY
Since I know no details of what you are dealing with - I can't give much advice... BUT this is how things have worked for me FOR THE MOST PART:

PRIOR to doing anything drastic or embarrassing (to myself or others) ~~ because SOMETIMES there ARE extenuating circumstances ~~ I have - in the past - emailed a few (1-2) close friends/ chippers - people I trust - and have asked for suggestions or their opinions - in hopes to investigate more personal and private attempts for resolution.

In some cases the "resolution" (and this is FOR ME) has been simply to let the matter go. In every single case where I have "had problmes" of any kind... the matter HAS ALWAYS been resolved eventually - and I didn't even have to act too badly very often.

I figure it this way: if I follow the long-timer's advice, then I can blame them if anything goes wrong

Seriously - getting advice, information and communicating as much as possible - PRIVATELY with others has kept me - FOR THE MOST PART - in fairly good graces around here.

GOOD LUCK!!