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The Chip Board Archive 22

grin NCR ~ Friday Humor... 1:35 AM, EDT

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Halloween Advice For Seniors

Top Signs That You're Too Old to Trick or Treat

10. You get winded from knocking on the door.

9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.

8. You ask for high fiber candy only.

7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.

6. People say, "What a scary mask!" but you're not wearing a mask!

5. When the door opens you yell, "Trick or..." and can't remember the rest.

4. By the end of the night, you have a bag full of restraining orders.

3. You have to carefully choose a costume that won't dislodge your hairpiece.

2. You're the only Power Ranger in the neighborhood with a walker.

And, last but not least...

1. You avoid going to houses where your ex-wives live

The Top 10 Least Popular Halloween Handouts

10. Spinach flavored Rice Cakes.

9. Teeth removing Taffy

8. Metamucil in a straw

7. Ex-Lax Brownies

6. Caramel Covered Zucchini

5. Colored Crisco on a Stick

4. Hot steaming bowl of pumpkin guts

3. Chocolate Covered Prunes

2. A Handful of Red Man

1. Anything that ticks!
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Copyright 2022 David Spragg