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Unable to decide which of these two jokes to post, I thought I'd post both...

When asked by a young patrol officer "Do you know you were speeding?"

This 83-year-old woman talked herself out of a ticket by stating: "Yes,
but I had to get there before I forgot where in the hell I was going."
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THE TRICK IS TO FIND THE MAN IN THE COFFEE BEANS.
This is bizarre. After you find the man, it's so obvious. Once you find him,
it's embarrassing, and you'll think to yourself:
Why didn't I see him immediately?

Doctors have concluded that if you find the man in the coffee beans
in 3 seconds, the right half of your brain is better developed than most
people. If you find the man between 3 seconds and 1 minute, the right half
of the brain is developed normally. If you find the man between 1 minute
and 3 minutes, then the right half of your brain is functioning slowly and
you need to eat more protein. If you have not found the man after 3 minutes,
the advice is to look for more of this type of exercise to make that part of your
brain stronger! And YES, the man is really there!