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Abie, a somewhat shy and retiring gentleman who lives southwest, sent this one...

A Blonde's Year in Review:

January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels... Helllloooo!
Bottles won't fit in typewriter!

March - Got really excited! Finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months... The box
said "2-4 years!"

April - Trapped on escalator for hours... Power went out!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid. Wrong instructions.... 8 cups of water won't
fit into those little packets!

June - Tried to go water skiing. Couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition. Learned later, that the other
swimmers cheated... They used their arms!

August - Got locked out of my car in rain storm.... Car swamped because the
soft-top was open.

September - The capital of California is "C." Isn't it???

October - Hate M &M's! They are SO hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days. Instructions said 1 hour per pound and
I weigh 108!

December - Couldn't call 911! Duh! There's no eleven button on the stupid
telephone!

What a year! Phew!
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