-- If you grow up in Hawaii , raised by your grandparents, you're
"exotic, different."

-- Grow up in Alaska eating moose burgers, you are a quintessential
American story.

-- If your name is Barack you're a radical, unpatriotic Muslim.

-- Name your kids Willow, Trig and Track, you're a maverick.

-- Graduate from Harvard law School and you are unstable.

-- Attend 5 different small colleges before graduating, you're well
grounded.

-- If you spend 3 years as a brilliant community organizer, become
the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter
registration drive that registers 150,000 new voters, spend 12 years
as a Constitutional Law professor, spend 8 years as a State Senator
representing a district with over 750,000 people, become chairman
of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, spend
4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of 13 million
people while sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs,
Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you
don't have any real leadership experience.

-- If your total resume is: local weather girl, 4 years on the city
council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000
people, 20 months as the governor of a state with only 650,000
people, then you're qualified to become the country's second highest
ranking executive.

-- If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years while
raising 2 beautiful daughters, all within Protestant churches, you're
not a real Christian.

-- If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress, and left
your disfigured wife to marry the heiress the next month, you're a
Christian.

-- If you teach responsible, age appropriate sex education, including
the proper use of birth control, you are eroding the fiber of society.

-- If, while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence only, with
no other option in sex education in your state's school system, while
your unwed teen daughter ends up pregnant, you're very responsible.

-- If your wife is a Harvard graduate lawyer who gave up a position
in a prestigious law firm to work for the betterment of her inner city
community, then gave that up to raise a family, your family's values
don't represent America 's.

-- If your husband is nicknamed "First Dude", with at least one DWI
conviction and no college education, who didn't register to vote until
age 25 and once was a member of a group that advocated the secession
of Alaska from the USA, your family is extremely admirable.

OK, much clearer now.

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