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The Chip Board Archive 14

grin NCR · Monday Humor...

grin JUST GOTTA LOVE ALABAMA...

How do you know when you're staying in an Alabama hotel?
When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink," and the clerk replies, "Go ahead."

How can you tell if an Alabama redneck is married?
There's dried tobacco juice on both sides of his pickup truck.

Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age in Alabama to 32?
It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.

What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw" in Alabama?
Documentaries.

Where was the toothbrush invented?
Alabama. If it had been invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teeth brush.

Did you hear about the $3 million Alabama State Lottery?
The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years.

The governor's mansion in Alabama burned down!
Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park.
The library was a total loss too. Both books-poof! up in flames and he hadn't even finished coloring one of them.

A new law was recently passed in Alabama. When a couple gets divorced, they are STILL cousins.

An Alabama State trooper pulls over a pickup on I-65 and says to the driver, "Got any I.D.?"
and the driver replies "Bout wut?"

A guy from Alabama passed away and left his entire estate to his beloved widow, but she can't touch it 'til she's 14.

A guy walks into a bar in Alabama and orders a mudslide.
The bartender looks at the man and says, "You ain't from 'round here are ya?
"No," replies the man, "I'm from Arkansas".
The bartender looks at him and says, "Well, what do ya do in Arkansas?"
"I'm a taxidermist," said the man.
The bartender, looking very bewildered now, asks, "What in the world is a tax-e-derm-ist?
"The man says,"I mount animals".
The bartender stands back and hollers to the whole bar..."It's okay boys, he's one of us!"


Copyright 2022 David Spragg