An old man and his wife turn in for the evening. After lying in bed for
a few minutes the old man cuts a fart and says, "Seven points."

His wife rolls over and says "What in the world was that?"

"Touchdown," says the old man. "I'm ahead 7 to nothing."

A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says, "Touchdown, tie
score."

Ten minutes later the old man farts again and says, "Touchdown, I'm
ahead 14 to 7."

Now starting to get into it, the wife quickly farts again and says,
"Touchdown, tie score."

Not to be outdone, the old man tries for another score, but to no avail.
He can't fart! So he strains real hard, but he still can't fart.
Finally, he gives it everything he has and winds up depositing a big
mess in the bed.

The wife asks, "What the hell was that?"

The old man replies, "Half-time...switch sides."