I collect shaggy dog stories as well as chips; here's one from

Joke du Jour (sm) Set 1. Volume 24; Issue 30. Dec 30, 1999

"Pocket"

It's New Year's Eve. Kelly walks into a bar and
orders beer and a shot of whiskey. The bartender
gives him a beer and a shot of whiskey. Kelly
drinks his beer and pours the shot of whiskey
into his shirt pocket. Kelly orders another beer
and another shot of whiskey. Kelly drinks the
beer and pours the shot of whiskey into his
pocket.

The bartender says, "Look, Mac, it's New Year's
Eve, and I know we're both depressed, and I
certainly don't mean to bug you, but my curiosity
is "killing" me. Why do you keep pouring the
shots in your pocket?" Kelly says, "It's none of
your damn business! And if you be givin' me a
hard time, I'll be breaking your bloody face!"

At this time, a little mouse pops out of Kelly's
shirt pocket and says, "And that goes for your
cat, too!"

Happy New Year (at least we all agree on that fact)